Surveillance Drone
I go to this nearby park every morning for yoga. The park officially opens at 5am. Unless, the anonymous guy is in town. Then it opens at 4:30. Maybe he's a spirit, I've never seen him. But when he's around, the gate is open.
There are three premium athletes who arrive before official timings: me, the spirit, and the cyclists. The cyclists, you cannot come early enough to see them arrive. They almost certainly sleep under the park's green gym like cicadas — wake at dawn, emerge, and immediately begin pedaling. The creaky cycles don't help the allegations.
Before yesterday, I'd never had to hop the gate as the spirit would keep it open always. Last I had to hopp was when the guard was ill and everyone was standing outside the gate, their build preventing them from climbing the gate. Some regulars were discussing if they should break the lock and buy a new one later. There was this one aunty who acclaimed "that's against the rules". Yeah, big brains aunty, breaking the lock is against the rules.
Little did I know she'll make a return later in the show with a different hat.
Yesterday, 4:40am. Spirit is out of town. I hop the gate. Cyclists are already cycling. I set up my mat.
About 5am. The guard came in eventually, slightly perturbed. He asked if I hopped over the gate, I said yes, thinking he saw me when I entered and has an issue. He mentioned there is this aunty who takes pictures of people hopping over the gates, passes them to the manager who had called him a day ago. I didn't need to rethink it, it had to be the same aunty. Apparently she not only is very intelligent, but also has a lot of free time to support her intellectual pursuits.
I told the guard, that if he got the call from the manager yesterday, it couldn't have been me because I just jumped today after months. But nevertheless, he had a solution. He said If I could open the gates, it'd be all okay. He then took me to show the keys which are hidden in this secret location.
Well, the secret location turned out to be inside the garden.
That's right. So you have to hop the gate to open the gates, to solve the problem of the surveillance aunty watching out for people hopping over the gate. The guard seems satisfied by the logic loop. I didn't have the heart to debug it.
Now here's where it stands: The cyclists come before me so they have to be hopping over the gate. Then I come hop over the gate again, but this time to open the gate. Then the guard comes. So now we have three people hopping over the gate, an aunty watching over, and a guard who's done his due diligence of handling the situation.